Some things I've been thinking lately, for quick moments, often for no reason and, really, can't be explained. I wrote a column like this in college once and some lame ass left me a voicemail whining that crap like that could get into the paper but the paper wouldn't hire his friend as a columnist. Of course, he didn't leave a name or number. Coward. So if anyone else finds this exercise dumb, either keep your bitching to yourself or 'fess up. No anonymous slams. That's just weak.

I wonder how much money I could make if I gave a bunch of kindergarten girls lots of candy, filmed them, and marketed it as Girls Gone Wild.

Rooting for the Yankees is like rooting for the sun to come up ? if it doesn't happen today (a win, that is), it will surely happen tomorrow. Where's the fun in that?

Is there such a thing as Late Onset Bowling Soreness? I ache more today than I did yesterday. And there's definitely some pain in the rotator cuff area of my right shoulder. That is, if that is where the rotator cuff is to be found. OK, I'm pretty certain that it is, but I have no idea if that's what hurts.

Who the hell is responsible for Joshua Gracin remaining on American Idol? Is it the Marines? I bet that's it ? or because he's in the military, Dubya and Rummy are behind it somehow.

Do you think Dr. Atkins would've lived after his fall on a NYC street if he'd had more body fat?

Does the Weather Channel have a quota on how many female anchors must be pregnant at one time? When one has a baby, does another have to get knocked up within a certain time frame? Do they have to sign a contract that states they will get pregnant during their time with the network?

I hate people who make no effort to move aside when you're walking toward one another in a narrow walkway. In two trips to the printer in the past five minutes (involving a total of 10 steps, round-trip, from my desk), two people have made no effort to move to one side of the small opening between the cubicles. I adjust my path, but they don't, leaving me rubbing up against the fabric on the cubicle panels.

That's the best I can do right now. What a busy day.