Well, seeing as how yesterday got away from me what with the studying the NCAA Tournament field and reading up on the war situation and reading Heather's 250th entry and, you know, working, I didn't get to update. Not that I had much to say, considering I updated twice over the weekend. So I thought I'd get this out of the way this morning (while still at home, no less) and then come back atcha if I have more this afternoon.

Before leaving work at 9:30 last night, I said to Dylan, "I won't be in until after 10 tomorrow."

"Oh, OK," he said, "I was going to tell you to come in at 11, but if you want to come in at 10, that's fine."

"Eleven it is," I said and ran out.

I was tired last night, though, so after watching the end of Big Bucks: The Press Your Luck Scandal on Game Show Network last night, Casey and I were fast asleep in minutes and I was well rested by 8 a.m. today. So I'll have a leisurely morning eating breakfast and showering, then I think I'll swing by Staples for a paper shredder, and then I've got to go to the post office and hardware store. It's a good day for errands.

I may or may not get back to this, but with no other things considered, how much must it suck to be Saddam Hussein. All of a sudden, President Yosemite Sam in America starts shooting his guns off in the air and whooping wildly and tells him that he has to comply with U.N. regulations and let inspectors into Iraq. So he does that, and the inspectors find some mildly incriminating things, and order them destroyed. Saddam balks again, but then relents and begins destroying the weapons he's not supposed to have. So then Yosemite Sam says, "Uh, well, that's not enough. Now you have to leave. In 48 hours." And, in a great move of fourth-grade playground diplomacy, Iraq said, "No, YOU should step down."

I mean, it must suck to be Saddam, because he can't please this guy. (Granted, it must suck to be a hideous dictator on the express train to hell, but that's not the point right now.) A little more than a year ago, Yosemite Sam turned to his advisers and said, "Well, this guy tried to kill my dad and he's got all this oil that I'd like, so let's go get him. Let's set some guidelines with the help of the U.N., because they're going to shit a brick if we go after him ourselves, that he can't possibly meet, and then we'll have a reason to go get him."

But as Saddam reluctantly met each demand (after trying to dodge them, yes), Yosemite Sam said, "Dammit! Raise the bar again! Make sure he can't meet our demands!" And then when he did, Sam threw his 10-gallon hat on the ground and stomped on it with two feet and said, "That's it! He's got to go. That's all we'll accept!"

I'm convinced: Our country is being run by a 3-foot-6 cartoon cowboy who goes around shooting his guns in the air without a care.

I love how Yosemite Sam (or Monkey or Shrub or whatever you'd like to call Dubya) goes on TV and tells the "American people" that he's doing this for our safety, to protect us, and before they've even turned off the TelePrompTers, the security alert level is bumped up to Orange because the government fears that an attack on Iraq will spark terrorists to attack us. Yes, we need to get Saddam out of Iraq, but if launching an attack is going to bring an increased risk of attacks on America, shouldn't we think this through a little more? Not only that, but Osama bin Laden has proven to be a much greater threat to the American people, but he's not in control of any oil, so Yosemite Sam isn't paying attention to him. Gee, I don't know, but with the arrest of one of his highest-ranking lieutenants in Pakistan a few weeks ago and the belief that bin Laden might be in the area of the Afghanistan/Pakistan border, and with the reports that authorities are closing in on the area thinking he may still be there, don't you think it might be a good time to seize this opportunity and get the REAL BAD GUY??? Granted, it's not much of an advantage or a lead, but dammit, it's more than we've had since December 2001.

You know why Yosemite Sam is hell-bent on getting Saddam? Other than the oil, I mean? Because he's from Texas. You ask all the people in Texas and the plains states and all those rural areas that are far, far away from the fallout zones around Chicago, New York, Washington, L.A., San Francisco, etc., and they'll say, "Get the bastard." Because they won't sniff an attack on America. I'd like to see a study or a survey or something on the feelings of people in the middle of the country regarding 9/11. I bet many of them have forgotten. Well, not forgotten, but it certainly isn't in the forefront of their minds. But on the East Coast, we're reminded regularly. In New York, it's every day. You can't go anywhere in the city without seeing a flag or a photo of the World Trade Center or a poster or ad for post-9/11 support services or recruitment posters for the NYPD and NYFD. And when an Orange Alert goes up on Tom Ridge's Alert By Numbers coloring book, it doesn't mean, "Watch out in Montana." It means, "Be careful New York and Washington and both coasts and all of you on American military bases and embassies around the world."

But Yosemite Sam will be hunkered in his bunker while some able-bodied military man runs the show from the White House War Room.

Ugh, I'm annoyed with myself now. I'll be back later with something more lighthearted.