WEDDING Saturday I wake up and am making my bed when Bryan opens the door to my room and scares the shit out of me. �I was wondering if you were up,� he says. I certainly am now. We walk into the kitchen and talk with Kathy and Janet over breakfast. We learn that bulldog puppies can bring $1,200 to $1,500 each, and Janet plans to use her half to save for a car. Kathy also mentions Petey, who loves men, and he keeps running between Bryan and me. We toss his tennis ball and he runs after it, often sliding head-first into a wall in pursuit. We talk baseball, too, because Kathy was at the Diamondbacks game the night before when the Cardinals� Jose Jimenez tossed a 1-0 no-hitter to beat Randy Johnson, who struck out 14. (Ten days later, July 5, Jimenez again wins 1-0, allowing two hits in St. Louis. Johnson K�s 12.) Bryan and I then take Petey outside and make him chase the ball. �He�s so stupid,� Kathy says, �he�d keep playing until he dropped dead.� We don�t push him that hard, and when we head for the pool, he immediately jumps in and throws up. We swim for a while, getting a kick out of the water guns and noodles, as well as the diving board and slide, hot and dry in the Phoenix sun, which we have to wet down with the guns. After the swim we pack the car, stop by the pawn shop, and pick Mia up at the airport.

Once outside the airport, Mia immediately comments on the heat. She�s ready for lunch, so we stop at a KFC on Guadalupe or Baseline � after driving through ASU in Tempe � and then make our way to the hotel. The directions were now a little different � well, I have to adjust because Bryan did not take I-10 from I-17 and the airport. So we follow a roundabout route because, although a road may be continuous through several towns � a direct straight line, with no turns or forks � it might have more than one name as it crosses a town line. Or not. There�s no telling without a good map � which we lack. Main St. in Mesa is University Ave. in Tempe. Country Club in Chandler is Woodland or something to the east. Ah, therein lies the flaw in the simple grid system of the Phoenix suburbs.

We make it to our San Marcos Resort and our room turn out to be on the same courtyard as Jen and Michelle�s, where Joe is staying the night of the wedding. In the process of unloading the car, Bryan closes the door on my tripod, breaking it. �Your tripod broke,� he tells me. Already bothered by the heat and a little tired at the moment � we all were � I get upset. I cannot stay in the room while Bryan irons, so I cross the courtyard to talk to Joe and the girls. It�s good to see Joe again � it has been 10 months since I left his farm in northwest Illinois for Michelle K(a)'s house in the Chicago suburb of Arlington Heights. We catch up and chat for a while while Michelle K(i)irons her dress for the night. I go back to our room and put on my bathing suit to go to the pool with Mia while Bryan continues preparing his clothes. We go nuts on the sunscreen, terrified of the Phoenix sun.

As soon as we hit the pool, Mia�s idea of Arizona changes. �If this is Arizona, where do I sign up?� she says smiling. We meet up with Sarah and Megan and enjoy the water and the hot sun. Bryan joins us and Mia leaves for the shower, then we follow to get ready for our first peer wedding. Ever. A sobering thought to be sure.

We�re not happy, Bryan and I, about having to wear jackets in 100o heat, even for a 6 p.m. wedding. We hold off as long as we can, donning them just as we enter the church. On the way over, we talk about some of our other friends, mentioning how one person in particular is shallow, in Mia�s words. �She�s �No diving allowed,�� I say, quoting a sign by the pool. That line provides laughs for the rest of the visit. Immediately through the doors, we see Mrs. Collins and talk with her for a moment � enough time for her to joke that I made her look bad in my manuscript from the previous summer.

Inside, we sit behind Joe and Mike, near the back with a perfect view of the wedding party on its way down the aisle � until the wedding photographer steps in to do his job. I lean in front of Bryan for my one shot � a perfect one of Courtenay and her dad, hand-in-hand down the aisle.

A nice service, with a beautiful singing performance by Jennifer Mills and a series of very good looking bridesmaids, and not without some humorous moments, too � like when the priest says, �Courtenay and her husband Christ � Courtenay and her husband in Christ ...� Throughout the service, I occasionally think of next summer when we�ll be at Mike�s and Barb�s nuptials. Apparently, so did Mike. �All I kept thinking was, �I�m next,�� he says afterward.

Outside later, I take a shot of our gang in the picturesque courtyard and then put myself in good position for Courtenay and CJ when they emerge, circle the fountain, and disappear again.

When everyone heads for the reception nearby, we return to the hotel for Bryan�s camera. Before entering the reception at the club house of the golf course in the Collins� development, Bryan and I pose, all dressed up, next to the Mustang. Inside, we find seats saved at a table with Megan, Sarah, Michelle, Jen, Joe and Mike. Barb, at the head table with the wedding party, joins us periodically, then regularly after dinner, when people are up and partying all over the place.

Before going in, we sign the guest book � I include something about how Courtenay and Cande belong together, and it�s apparent to everyone there. With the open bar (though closed during dinner), we all get pretty happy. Not drunk, just happy. The party starts with a traditional Mexican line dance involving the wedding party, parents and anyone who wants to join. None of us do though. Courtenay and CJ made their entrance to the Notre Dame Victory March. During the party, I�m lucky enough to have a dance with Barb, Michelle and Mindy, and we all spend a lot of time on the dance floor. I need a break after �Woolly Bully,� when Mike and Barb lead the conga line. With the long rails of Barb�s dress dragging behind her, I have to high step wide to avoid stepping on it. It�s an exhausting way to dance along a conga line, and by the end of the song I catch the end of the bow at one point, undoing it, though it has no bearing on her dress support � it�s just for show. I also get a moment to talk with the three other Collinses, telling them how great the wedding is and how much I love Arizona after only eight days there. One of the last things Mr. Collins says to me is, �Well, I expect to see your byline in the Arizona Republic soon.�

Courtenay stopped by our table earlier in the night and leaned over to give me a nice hug while I sat in my seat. We only had a little time with her � she being the bride and all. The band consists of friends of CJ�s, and he joins them on stage for a few songs � Mike really is next � and he can play that guitar. The band also plays a few originals � �Courtenay�s Song,� which CJ wrote for her in college, and a beautiful bilingual ballad Dr. Jauregui wrote for the newlyweds.

That part of the evening ends nicely. Trading room numbers with Kelli and Kimberly, we talk about swimming in the hotel pool as well as our tubing expedition for the next day. I make sure to say goodbye to Courtenay, hugging her and kissing her on the cheek. With an, �Oh, now let me give you one,� she returns it.

Bryan � sober and all � drives us back to the hotel, where Mia decides not to join in the late swim. �Don�t get me kicked out of the hotel when you guys get caught,� she says, or something similar. That doesn�t happen � not even close. Bryan and I �pick� up Kelli and Kimberly and head down to the pool, where there�s a big party going on. Keg, loud music, everything. We then notice people dressed kinda weird � long, flowing black dresses, medieval-type garb, props. We don�t see Tim and his friends � other members of the wedding party � at first. I run back to Tim�s room to see if they�re there, but someone�s girlfriend (I guess) tell me they�re at the pool. I return to find Bryan, Kim and Kelli still standing there. I find Tim in the pool and we walk in, opening the gate � which we expected to be locked.

The pool is packed, with many of the partiers swimming. We find a nice corner to ourselves. Kim and I jump in; Bryan and Kelli sit on the side, content to soak their feet. After Kim and I swim around a little with Tim and the guys we float along the side where Bryan and Kelli sit. That�s where we all remain for an hour, I�d guess.

Then things get interesting. One of the convention-goers swims up to us. He�s in his 30s � maybe late 20s � with a beard (neatly kept) and long hair tied back in a pony tail. He comes over and starts talking to us. To us, not with us. It�s a recruiting pitch � he�s trying to get us to join his little role-playing club. The Dark Ones (at www.darkones.org) are one small sect, to which he belongs. It�s part of a larger organization � One World By Night (www.owbn.org). They�re Dungeons & Dragons role-playing folk � who range from their early 20s to middle-aged couples with kids. The disturbing thing is the kids walking around the resort in little sorcerers or witches garb or something.

So in his recruiting spiel this guy talks about the different characters available to those of us who might be interested in joining. He�s a vampire slayer, I think. I make some flip comment about that being what I would want to be, and so I cannot join. �No, you could be one too,� he replies. �You could be my son.� Ummm ... No. During this guy�s rambling, I actually need to submerge my mouth and nose underwater to keep from laughing out loud.

After what seemed like an hour-long talk, another vampire weirdo swims over, and the two of them start wrestling there in the water, which must�ve been eight feet deep. Very amusing. And disturbing.

Shortly after that, Kimberly leaves with one of the guys � and we later pass them kissing on one of the walkways near our room. Kelli cannot get into theirs because Kim had taken their keycard. Bryan goes along with Kelli as she gets a copy form the desk or something, and Kim returns another half hour or so later. We all sleep well to be ready for the next day and our tubing adventure on the Salt River.